SteveY's thoughts on...

Help!

    FreedomWorks is very inspiring. Where I live you wouldn't even know there was a conservative/republican uprising in Nov. Most of the same people were voted back in. A terrible situation. So it is pushing me into a position to try and do something about it. A core, serious group of people are needed to work this area. I guess my first priority is to find a few people ready and willing here in S.E. CT. that are ready to stand up and fight with me. If anybody reads this and is out there I can obviously be found on Facebook, Ican also be found on Twitter @ http://twitter.com/#!/SteveYankowski so if you would like to help make a change chat me up.

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I've been mentally overwhelmed as to what to blog/write about lately. I was talking to someone yesterday whom I haven't talked to for a while who said I sounded so good and upbeat, different and together. I don't feel that way at all. I feel more confused and fragmented. That has more to do with what has been going on in the world than what is going on in Steve. My problem is motivation which I can change at any moment I choose to. The worlds problems are much more pervasive, our economic and social issues are staggering. Maybe I'm just getting tired but things just seem to be getting exponentially worse with the world each day that goes by. I'm not just talking about unemployment, inflation, gas prices, political chicanery etc. The seems to be an underlying current of social (despair, disconnect, tension?). I feel it. Do you? I've always had an innate ability (instinct?) to pick up on such things and whenever I ignored it the repercussions were staggering. I ignore at my own peril. I just can't seem to put my finger on the pulse of the exact problem. The vulnerability I've been feeling is directly connected to the things in the world I can't control. I know this sounds like a personal problem but my world has always been "shaky". I'm living less on the edge now than I ever have before. So why do I feel more vulnerable? It's got to do with whats going on in the world. Our way of life, our freedoms and way of life as I've known it is in real jeopardy. And I feel  helpless to do anything about it. I know this sounds vague at best or that I'm suffering from paranoia at worst. I assure you thats not it. I guess with my rising sense of political and social awareness my own individual beliefs are being shaken to the core. There is a saying "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything!" Which I've always been a true believer in that statement. The problem I have today is that I don't necessarily trust the ground I'm standing on. The winds of change never really bothered me before probably because they were more personal. Changes in my life I would somehow cause. Now though it seems like I'm just holding my breath waiting for the world to explode. There seems to be no solid "truths" to hold on to anymore. Like everything is relative. I can't even wrap my brain around relative to what? I really believe my country, my way of life, my security in the world is all being threatened. The world itself is being threatened. On a higher or deeper level. The point being something is inherently wrong with the world today and I DON'T LIKE IT!

The morning after...

Amongst the tears of the families of the fallen, six more people including two cops were shot in Baltimore overnight. Yet it's a Sun. morn. and we will all begin our day. Me? I already started a sauce for a friend of mine and his little six year old girl that will be over later for diner. Why am I going here? Because life will still go on. Even with the evil that goes on whether it's blatant like yesterday Baltimore last night or behind the scenes such as G. Sorros. Resilient we all are, but how is it affecting the world around us? Well, a couple of notches are tightened on the social and political stress level for sure! This has what's been going on for a couple years now. Little by slowly the noose has been tightening. Socially, economically, politically and it culminates in our individual stomachs, minds, and souls. We'll all go on with our day today, but not without a little darker, longer more fearful shadow creeping it's way into our hearts. My little girl is grown now. I could not fathom the sorrow of the little nine year olds parents who will be waking without her this morning. I think what will add a lot of extra sorrow is the fact we will all be listening to people, politicians and news pundits trying to use the tragedy of yesterday to gain some sort of upper hand whether it be ratings or trashing an opponent. All of it building on the fear, frustration, anger and confusion to try to control or sway the public opinion (us) to their or an unseen direction or conclusion. Sad, scary, maddening and downright manipulative. So where am I going with this? An extension of the blog of yesterday, when is enough to much? As a society as well as individually the answer needs to be found before the state of to much is reached.